#ThingsKidsSay: Ruining Reputations

Over the past year or so, I’ve noticed Little Man making the transition from calling me “Mommy” to calling me “Mom.” At first he started calling me “Mom” in front of other kids and called me “Mommy” in private, but now it’s mostly “Mom,” unless he wants something. He’s nine now, so it’s about that time, I suppose.

Yesterday I showed Little Man a draft of a doodle post that I’m working on. It shows him doing something when he was younger, and in the picture, it shows him addressing me as “Mommy,” since that is what he called me then. Accuracy and all. This, I’ve found out, is problematic for me tween-to-be.

Those hobbit-sized feet are also accurate.

That’s me — the ruiner of reputations. Maybe that will be printed on my gravestone. I wonder how much longer I’ll be able to refer to him as “Little Man” before I’m accused of ruining his street creed.

What have your kids said to make you chuckle lately?

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My Favorite Toy

Ever since we grew our family by having Baby Girl, I’ve learned a few things. For one, I learned that there is no age limit on riding in those little Coupe cars (or other ride-on toys) intended for toddlers. If you can fit, you can attempt to ride, even if you’re 9 years old and your knees are up to your chin. (Yes, there is probably a call to the fire department to extract a child from a plastic car in our future.) Another thing I’ve learned is that you’re never too old to eat puffs (those fruit flavored cereal snacks for the babies old enough to crawl). Judging by how quickly Little Man would down these things, apparently they are akin to manna from heaven.

And I’ve also learned that nothing makes a toy more appealing than a sibling showing the least bit of interest in it.

Sigh.

Can y’all relate?

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I’m Dorky And I Know It

As you may have gathered from the title of this blog, the dork runs strong in me, and the rest of my family is no exception. My son once asked when he was going to get his nerd card, and my daughter came out of the womb with a Batman obsession. Dorky, among other things, is what we are, and we embrace it. 

Sometimes we embrace our inner dorks by changing the lyrics the popular songs. “Let It Go” becomes “Let Her Fart” (thanks, Little Man), “Summer Nights” became a song about Baby Girl’s bowel movements, and “Can’t Stop The Feeling” also became a song about flatulence. “My Heart Will Go On”…well, I probably don’t need to explain. (And apparently we all have the sense of humor of eleven year olds.)

Last week Little Man and I were making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. We were having a lazy dinner night, and the kids wanted PB&Js, which is perfect for lazy dinners, lunches, and pretty much everything. While making the sandwiches, I commented to Little Man that he and Baby Girl were certainly “all about that peanut butter.” And they are. Outside of pizza day at school, I can count the number of times LM has requested something other than PB&J for lunch on one hand, and BG loves peanut butter so much that she’ll eat at it straight from the jar.

“Yeah, we sure are,” he responded.

And then this was born:

Little Man suggested recording a video to put on YouTube, but I opted out. My singing abilities probably shouldn’t be showcased anywhere other than in doodled format. 

What songs do you like to change up for fun?

I got some cool news this morning — my Five Stages Of Dealing With Your Kids’ Carseats doodle will appear on Scary Mommy next Monday (if nothing changes scheduling wise). I’m excited about that. The text part of the post will be a bit more fleshed out, so I’ll post a link when it’s up next week.

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Top Five Songs For Migraines

For a time as a parent, I didn’t have to listen to crappy music. (My husband would say, “Wait, that’s not true because you love Hanson,” which I’d ignore while pitying him for not embracing their greatness.) When Little Man came along, we didn’t play much kiddie music. We stuck to our Beatles, Radiohead, Ben Folds, Weezer, Hanson (obviously I’ve got to mention them again), etc. He loved it all and we didn’t have to listen to cheesy crap sang in high-pitched voices, so all was right in the world. Even the music for the TV shows he watched was tolerable.

All was good in our parenting world for about six years, and then things changed.

Baby Girl came along. While she likes some of our music (especially Radiohead’s No Surprises, which has been on repeat every night for much of the past two and a half years), she prefers the cheesy kids’ songs. Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star. Five Little Monkeys. If You’re Happy And You Know It. Apples and Bananas. Itsy Bitsy Freaking Spider. And, despite having a playlist for her to shuffle through those songs, she usually picks one and wants it on repeat for the entire car ride. I get kinda road ragey as it is, but after the tenth time of listening to Itsy Bitsy Freaking Spider, all it takes for me to start cursing under my breath is for someone to put their signal light on at 90 feet out instead of 100 feet.

And then there are the songs or theme music on shows on YouTube and TV that both kids like. I liked the music on Thomas and Friends, Sid the Science Kid, and The Cat in the Hat Knows A Lot About That. The current shows they both watch? For the most part, just no. God no.

Aaaand, thanks to the newish car with satellite radio, Little Man has discovered Kidz Bop, also known as Music Hell. Kidz Bop is where they take popular music and ruin it. Much of the popular music is kind of bad already, but then they take it and make it worse with the crappy singing and such. And Little Man, the child we once bragged about for having excellent taste in music, loves Kidz Bop. (To be fair, he still likes a lot of great stuff, but Kidz Bop has tarnished his reputation.)

I’ve compiled a short list of songs that are driving me nuts right now. It could be longer. A lot longer. But there’s the matter of my laziness and the fact that y’all probably don’t want a doodled list of 1841 songs that are driving me nuts, so I cut it to five.

What song is likely to give you a headache if you have to hear it again?

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Life Goals #1

Netflix marathons are where it’s at, y’all.

And why on earth am I just now getting into Gilmore Girls? I had watched a few episodes before and liked it, but never watched more for some reason. (I probably defaulted back to The Office.) I picked up on it again after Prison Break started sucking. I’m loving it so far!

What’s one of your life goals right now? If you’re kinda lazy like me and don’t have one, then we can just talk about your Netflix preferences. 😉

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Friday Five Blog Share

Imitation is flattery, right? Like other bloggers — cough, All In A Dad’s Work, cough — I’m going to follow suit by sharing a list of blog posts that I enjoyed throughout the week. As you may have gathered already, I’ll be doing this share on Fridays. (Hopefully most Fridays, but probably not all because of mommy brain.) And I’ll be sharing five blog posts. (Some of these may relate to parenting and some may not.)

Without further ado, here are five blog posts I enjoyed this week:

Searching For Friendship With My Eyes Closed on Motherhood Made Me Do It. Is the social awkwardness strong with you, too? Then you’ll totally relate to this post.

Ten Questions I Asked My Kids on All In A Dad’s Work. The candy tax is ingenious.

Boy Imagination Station on Rhythm In Life. Her 7-year-old comes up with a great way to get out of baths.

Toddler Talk Tuesday: Imitating Parents on Welcome To the Nursery. The little ones do pick up on everything we say.

Why I Don’t Want To Hear About Your Why on The Commutary. Multi-level marketing is definitely annoying as hell, especially on social media.

Feel free to share a link to one of your own posts or to a post from another blogger that you enjoyed this week below.

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Things Kids Say Thursday: New Ears

Sometimes kids can say the sweetest things.

As some of y’all already know, I have hearing loss in both ears. I was born with nerve damage, so I’ve dealt with that all my life. I can hear, but I can’t hear that great and sometimes I miss a lot of stuff, especially if there’s background noise.

Yesterday, we were waiting on a phone call from Little Man’s doctor when Baby Girl told me that my cell was ringing. I didn’t hear it at all. I told her later that I appreciated her telling me it was ringing since I can’t hear well.

“Mommy’s ears don’t work very well, so I need your help hearing things sometimes,” I told her.

“Your ears not work?” she asked.

“Not very good,” I answered.

“Poor Mommy,” Baby Girl said, looking sad. And then she said this:

Y’all, I about melted. (And that’s me melting, in case you couldn’t tell.) Had we been at Walmart or somewhere else with all the toys when she said that, she’d have gotten everything. Sometimes it really amazes me at the sweet, thoughtful stuff she can come up with. (Her brother is the same way — he’ll even turn subtitles on my movies for me without asking.)

What’s one of the sweetest thing you’ve ever heard your kid say?

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