Parenting Books I Need To Read

Raise your hand if you’ve ever purchased a parenting book. Keep your hand raised if you discovered the secret to successful parenting in the book’s 150 (or so) pages of print.

Don’t worry if your hand isn’t still up — mine isn’t, either. I imagine most of us are in the same boat. We’ve all purchased book after book, hoping to find parenting advice that will make everything click and help us rock the parenting gig. Ultimately, our hopes of finding the book that will make everything clear are dashed, and we’re back to facing the reality that our kids will end up in therapy in 20 years, complaining about where we went wrong.

There is a parenting book for just about every subject — potty training, dealing with temper tantrums, raising happy children. Most of these books — like the one where you successfully potty train a toddler in 72 hours or less — sound too good to be true, but it’s hard not to give it a try, right? Just like the multi-level marketing schemes where you’re promised to secure your financial future and drive a BMW by the end of the calendar year, the allure is there. It’s tough to pass up the opportunity to become a parenting rock star.

So we buy the books. We pour through the pages, read the mostly regurgitated content, and yet again come to terms with the fact that we’ll never be on top of our game. Our kids will be in diapers until they start first grade, we’ll never get our kids to listen without raising our voices, and getting them to sleep through the night in their own beds won’t happen until college.

It’s not all for nothing, though. The good thing about all of these parenting books is that they make fabulous paper weights. As evidenced by my toddler’s scribbles in a book about raising defiant children, they make for great coloring sheets. I imagine that they’d be useful as fire starters. And, if all else fails, you can toss them in your donate pile and get a twenty-five cent tax write-off. Someone else will get the opportunity to have their hopes raised — and ultimately dashed — for the price of a candy bar.

Recently the topic of parenting books came up in a discussion my husband and I were having with another relative. I pulled out a few of the books I’ve purchased over the years. I had books on positive parenting, parenting the whole-brain child, raising a strong-willed child, raising a gifted child, and parenting a defiant child. We had a laugh over the titles, as my toddler had done at least a dozen things during the past hour to show that the book on raising strong-willed children hadn’t helped.

And then my husband made the comment, “If they really wanted to help parents, they’d make a book called How Not To Kill Your Kids.”

My husband’s comment made me think a little bit about parenting books I wish I would’ve read. Maybe none of them would make me feel like I’m winning at parenting, but they would be a lot more helpful — and realistic — than something like Potty Training Your Toddler In 3 Easy Steps. Here are a few titles that might have made for better reading:

Maybe these titles wouldn’t help me win any parenting awards, but at least I would’ve been prepared for the horror that was my toddler picking up a piece of poop and tasting it.

(I’m totally gonna use Shut The Fudge Up when I write my bad mom parenting book.)

Bonus

I forgot to put the parenting books back on the shelf last week. Baby Girl ripped the page out of the book about positive discipline. Minutes after I corrected her, she used a crayon to scribble in the book about the defiant child.

What book title would you like to see? 

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Author: Erika

I’m a SAHM to two kids. When I’m not doing all the typical mom things (diapers, soccer, etc.), I like writing, reading, and playing games. Clearly I live the life of a rock star.

154 thoughts on “Parenting Books I Need To Read”

  3. I’m really scared to be a mom 😩 I’m only 21, and it’s going to be a looooong time before I have kids. I can’t even deal with my dog whining at night!! I’m doomed

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  6. Pingback: Parenting Books I Need To Read — Dorky Mom Doodles – Get It Now
  8. Pingback: Parenting Books I Need To Read — Dorky Mom Doodles – Truly K. Bradley

  13. Lol I’d read all of them, even if just for a laugh. Nothing keeps the insanity in check like laughter… As long as it doesn’t get hysterical or something like mwhaha because that would be a step in the opposite direction

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  14. I absolutely love this post!!! As I sit down rubbing my head after fighting to get my 8 year old son to do his 11 page math homework for the past 4 hours. I would definitely love to read the book your husband suggested about “How not to kill your kids” lol. Boys get distracted so easily and plenty of times I get super frustrated and no one tells you these things when you have children smh. And now I decided to start all over again with a newborn 😭😭😭

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    1. Haha! Bless your heart. There is 6.5 years between my two. I thought that would be a good gap to avoid the fighting and stuff, but it’s not. Not even a little lol

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    1. Definitely. 😀 I’m likely going to name the book I’m working on for this blog now Don’t Lick That!

      That one also works for a marriage book 😉

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  22. Oh my gosh, this had me rolling!! I am a teacher/parent, and I like the idea of reading “Shut the Fudge Up” because I want to see what you have to say about the matter. I have had students use bad language. My daughter has recently been saying “Oh my god” with severe exasperation in her voice all over the place. Some kids think that this is a swear because of their religious upbringing. What do you think about that? Also, my daughter (5) says, “What the hut?” What do you suppose that means? Ha ha. Your post is awesome!

    Liked by 3 people

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    1. Sometime last year, a woman told my son he was making God cry because he said “oh my god!” I couldn’t care less about that 🤷🏻‍♀️ People are so serious! I’m glad you enjoyed it!

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  25. This post is hilarious and very true! I would definitely buy your parenting books and would include “Don’t eat the trash”.
    50 Ways of saying No is my favourite! LOL Definitely more useful than all the books I bought!

    Liked by 4 people

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